Have you ever heard yourself say that? You know how sometimes we feel like we HAVE to HAVE this? Because it's on sale, because it's the latest and the greatest, because we just can't go without : anything goes! “I need that. Here's my credit card.” 

Even if we know we don't really have the money in our bank account, it becomes a habit to be using plastic as a payment. What happens then is that we create this habit of always being behind in terms of money. Most Canadians have developed the habit of creating a bigger and bigger and bigger gap, debt-wise. In Canada, the average debt people carry, excluding mortgages, is about 30 000$. This is solely credit card and line of credit debt, too!

It's huge! We have so much debt. Last week, I talked about finance and money. A lot of people asked how to get rid of this bad habit. Here are the keys:

A habit of purchasing stuff or buying things has an intention behind the behaviour. The key here is to try to have a look at what this intention is. What does that do for you when you buy the latest and greatest? When you have the newest camera for your studio?  When you have the best lighting ever? When you purchase the latest iPhone? What happens is: we receive a benefit as we are shopping, as we're buying something. A feel-good-chemical runs in our bloodstream. Now, what exactly does the purchase, the act or the behaviour of purchasing something, do for us? Ask yourself this question repetitively and use the answer to formulate the next question.

Let me show you.  

Let's say I ask you : “What does that do for you to go shopping?”

“Well, I like to buy new stuff.”

 “What does that do for you to buy new stuff?”

 “Well, when I buy new stuff, I feel like I'm doing something for myself.”

“So when you do something for yourself, what does that do for you?”

 “Well it makes me feel like I'm important.”

“ What does that do for you when you feel like you're important?”

“Well, it makes me feel that I matter.”

 “What does that do for you to feel like you matter?”

“Well, when I feel like I matter, I feel like I am enough and I've always had this feeling that I was not enough. So I guess buying all this stuff makes me feel like I am enough.”

Okay. So now we got to the root, we got to the intention behind the behaviour. You realize that, for example, you’re doing this to make yourself feel like you are enough, to make yourself feel great. Won’t you still be enough without the iPhone 12? Is this really the thing that will prove to you that you are enough? When you get to this conclusion, you realize you can find something else to make yourself feel that you are enough. You can acknowledge your intentions behind your shopping habits.

For lots of people, buying stuff also makes them feel like they are taking time for themselves because they spend their whole life taking care of everybody else but them. Especially women: they take care of the kids, take care of the spouse, take care of the house, take care of everything. Plus, they work full-time and they have staff, they have employees and they take care of the whole world and they never take time for themselves.

When they shop, it makes them feel like they're taking time for themselves. Could they take time for themselves doing something that would be a benefit to their bank account instead of burying them deeper in the hole? It might not be a problem for you to be shopping. If it's a problem, then you can fix it. If it's not a problem, don't fix it. If it's a problem and it brings you even more behind in terms of your debt reimbursement, then maybe find something else that doesn't cost anything to make you feel like you're taking time for yourself. You can go for a walk, that's free. There are lots of things you can do that don't involve using your credit card.

Check out some of my previous blog posts...