THREE STEPS TO GET RID OF A LIMITING BELIEF
Our own limiting beliefs can be compared to the chronic pain that often becomes part of who we are and we think we are stuck with it. As mentioned in many of my articles, your unconscious mind is used as a personal assistant. Everything you say, and think is written down and executed like an order. If you have missed these articles, you can find out more about it here:
Here is how to change a limiting belief that doesn’t serve you anymore.
STEP 1: PUT IT BEHIND YOU
The first step to change is to linguistically start talking about the pain that you want to change, in the past tense.
For example, let’s say you think of yourself as being stubborn. The voice inside your head (your logical mind) says: “I am so stubborn”.
Linguistically, you can start the transformation process by saying instead: “I used to be so stubborn”. Unconsciously, as you speak of the characteristic as being in the past, you will start to believe that it is actually in the past. Which is totally true. You used to be stubborn. What this implies is that it is now over. That it is behind you. This affirmation will still feel true.
The next step is to follow this affirmation with a progressive statement.
STEP 2: PROGRESSIVE STATEMENT
Positive affirmations won’t work if when you say them out loud, they feel untrue. For example, when I work with clients going through grief, they work on creating positive statements that feel true to them. I am working with a couple who have lost their daughter. This is a terrible situation that no parent should ever have to experience. There is no way they can truly believe a positive affirmation worded like: “I am happy and excited about life!”. Right now, their reality is very much the opposite. The same applies to people who are excessively overweight. They will likely have difficulty in looking at themselves in the mirror and saying: “I am thin, svelte and I love my body”. Progressive statements are used to replace an old unwanted state, characteristic or behaviour. They usually would start with “I am in the process” or “I am willing to learn how it feels to” which would give them permission to be working towards the next level.
For example, the couple would say: “I am in the process of learning how to love life again and be happy with my spouse and my son” – yes, they also have a son to live for. The overweight person would say: “I am willing to learn how it feel to love my body, I am in the process of becoming thinner”. A progressive statement regarding your past characteristic stubbornness would look like: “I am willing to learn how it feels to be open to new ideas” or “I am in the process of opening myself to new ways or different things”. Repetition of the progressive statements will allow you to start programming your personal assistant with different ideas that will soon become your new reality.
STEP 3: NEW SERVING BELIEFS & NEW IDENTITY
After a few months, you will want to create new serving beliefs for yourself and start acting upon your new identity. You transition from the “I am willing to” or “I am in the process of” to the “I am” statement. Eventually, you will start repeating for yourself: “I am open to new things” “I love my new identity of being flexible and open to different ideas”. “I am easily adapting to any situation”.