HOW TO ANSWER THE QUESTION: “WHAT SHOULD I DO?”

"What should I do?" "Well, you should do this." Have you ever heard that? Have you ever said that? Has somebody ever told you what to do? Have you ever told somebody else what to do? Let's talk about this for a little bit. Today, I'll be using the video game universe to make my point. Stay tuned...

I'm too old for PS5s, so let's use Super Mario as an example instead (Yes, I know, this just gave away my age, LOL!). Let's say you're playing Super Mario, and it's your first time playing. You start at the very first level, right? Then, you get to a little flower, and there are some obstacles that come to you as well. Every time you hit one of these obstacles, then you get some points, right? That's the whole deal. In order to get to the next level, what do you have to do? You have to come across all the obstacles of the previous level and get these points.

Let's think about this for a second. Let's say there are two players: You, and someone that looks up to you. Your child, your staff, your friend... And they're facing an obstacle. If you say: "Move over!" and you go face the obstacle for them. Then what happens? You get the coins, they don't. And they stay on the same level, because they haven't still gotten the points from the first obstacle. But somehow, the obstacle is not there anymore. So they go over to the next one, and they ask you again: "What should I do?" And then you do the same thing. Once again, you get the points, not them.

Eventually, you get to the next level, because you got all the points for helping them. You are the one that had to think about a solution, but they never did. They never got the chance to become good at the first level. And if, by any chance at all, they get to the next level, they're not going to do very well, because they haven't gotten all the points. But more likely they're not even going to get there, because in order to get to the next level, you have to have completed the first one!

Here's what you should do instead. Give them the remote and say: "Practice. You'll get good at this. I trust you. Just practice over and over and over. You're going to figure this out." What is the number one thing you should say to somebody that's asking for help? You should say: "Well, I guess it's a weird situation that you are in right now. Not fun, right? Well, you know what? I trust you. You're gonna figure this out. Just keep at it, keep working at it."

And if they ask you about what you did, you can tell them, but also tell them about the Super Mario analogy and make them realize that's not going to help them get to their next level. If they're over 40, they might know what you're talking about!

Make sure that you don't steal anybody else's coins and you don't rob anybody from getting to their next level.