HOW TO GET SOMEONE TO BE MORE CONFIDENT

People around you are so much better than they think they are and we wish they could see it through our eyes because we have this huge admiration for them, but they don't see it themselves. So how do you get somebody to have more confidence in themselves? Watch the video or keep reading...

Happy Father's Day everyone. Hopefully you are taking the time today to speak to your dad, potentially spend some time with him or remember him if you are not lucky like I am that I still have my dad around.

I did send my dad a card and the card became the topic of this week’s blog. The card had that beautiful saying: On the front part of the card it said, when you told me that I could DO anything, I believed you. And when you told me that I could BE anything, I believed you. And then you opened the card and on the inside it said: So when I got out in the world and I had to believe in myself, I did. I have goosebumps. I'm feeling emotional right now. My dad (and my mom too) believed in me and therefore, I now believe in myself.

Because somehow, if you instill confidence in someone by TELLING them to believe in themselves, it's not necessarily going to work. But if you tell them that you believe in them, instead of telling them: "You have to believe in yourself", then the impact is much greater. It starts with somebody else believing in you. And because they believe in you, then, you can believe in yourself. So this week I thought: let's use this lesson for our blog.

How do you get somebody to have more confidence in themself? You potentially have people in your team, you have managers, you have clients, you have employees and maybe even friends that are looking up for your advice. And sometimes we know that people are so much better than they think they are and we wish they could see it through our eyes because we have this huge admiration for them, but they don't see it themselves. So how do you get somebody to have more confidence in themselves? You first trust them because trust will definitely bring their confidence up.

There are a few tools that you can use. Here are three big sentences that I use and I recommend that you might start using in your vocabulary.

YOU ARE VERY RESOURCEFUL

When you're dealing with people asking you for advice or looking up to you, whenever there's a challenge, the first thing you might want to say to the person is: "You are very resourceful." Tell them that they have what it takes, that you believe that they are resourceful.

I TRUST YOU

Then you use that magic sentence: "I trust You." Telling them that you trust them is the second piece. So first : "You are very resourceful", second: "I trust you".

YOU WILL FIGURE IT OUT

And then the third piece is: "You will figure this out" or "You will find a solution to that challenge" or "You will come out on top" or "You will learn something from this", "You will get out of this", "You will turn this around."

It's first to tell them that they are resourceful because they might not see it at this moment. You might have to point out something that they have done in the past to grant them this. You are very resourceful statement. And then you tell them that you trust them deep down that they can be trusted and that will increase the fact that they'll be more reliable, they'll have a better commitment, they'll feel more competent, they will feel more resourceful. They will increase their consistency if you keep telling them that they are resourceful and that you trust them and potentially increase their sincerity.

Make sure that you always accompany that by pointing out something great that they did. And then you move forward with the, "You will figure it out. You will come out on top, you will find a solution, I trust you will do this." It's a lot more powerful than if you find a solution for them. If you tell them that they have exactly what it takes to figure it out.

Whether it is people that are working for you, whether it's friend or whether it's your manager in the plant and you would like them to be more confident in their decision because if they're more confident, they'll be more performant as well. And you know that you want to draw the best out of your team, then make sure that you use these three technique and if you believe in them, then they will go out in the world and believe in themselves.

Again, happy Father's Day to everyone. Special, happy Father's Day to my father who is absolutely amazing and that I'm so lucky to have in my life as my biggest cheerleader. Always the biggest support. So thank you so much, dad. I love you very, very much and thank you for believing in me.