This week, I am addressing a very controversial topic. You can watch the video or you can read below.
“I do my hair toss, check my nails, baby how’re you feeling? Feeling Good as Hell!” I love this song from Lizzo.
Lizzo is one of the most amazing, icon to promote self-image, self-confidence, and body positivity. You may have heard of the big controversy about Lizzo and Jillian Michaels. Jillian Michaels was on a talk show and the host was saying: “I think it's amazing that Lizzo is promoting self-confidence and celebrating her body.” Jillian Michaels had a different opinion, which brought a lot of controversy. She mentioned something around the lines of: “Yes, however, if she gets diabetes or if she has any health problems related to her weight, then it's not to be celebrated.”
Now, the angle I want to bring to this story is: it is not important to look a certain way. What's important is what will that do for you? And, the question that we need to ask is: “Is this a problem?” If it's a problem, because your doctor said: “I think you might have a heart attack soon if you don't change your eating habits”, then you should lose weight. If it's just because you want to fit in that pair of jeans. It's not an important enough reason. A lot of people sit in my office and they tell me that they want to change something, that they have a goal. My first question to them is: “How is that a problem for you?” And very often it takes a long time before I can hear a problem because very often it is not a problem. So, I'm always asking: “How is that a problem for you?” So in this case, I would like to ask Lizzo: “Do you have any problem with it?”, and if it's not a problem for her, she does not have to have Jillian Michael's body.
So ask: “How is that a problem for you?” And if it is a problem, sure, let's fix it. When people come to me and they asked me to help them, I have programs, THINK Yourself® THIN, THINK Yourself® HEALTHY, THINK Yourself® CLEAN, THINK Yourself® WEALTHY, THINK Yourself® SUCCESSFUL, THINK Yourself® A RELATIONSHIPS PRO, etc. and lots of different resources to help people succeed. And my first question to them is: “I'm not hearing a problem. What is the problem?” And then: “How is that a problem for you?” They say: “Well, you know, if I was a little bit thinner, I would have more confidence.” Okay, so what you want is not to be thinner. What you want is confidence. I can help you with THAT. Then I go ahead and I help them with their confidence, which has nothing to do with helping them losing weight at all. We're just working on confidence. We figured out why is it, what is going on, what is the barrier that's in the way of them being confident?
Or sometimes they say: “Well, you know my marriage is not going so well, and I feel like if I lost a few pounds, maybe my partner would think of me as being more attractive.” Ah, so let's work on your marriage. Then I help them with relationships. Or sometimes they say: “Well it would help my career, you know, I'm a public figure and if I had a toned body, maybe it would help.” Okay, you want me to help with your career, let's help you with your career instead. You see, for a vast majority of people that sit in my office because they want to lose weight, we end up working on something else anyway, because of that question. “How is that a problem for you?” So if the problem is because your doctor said that you are prone to a heart attack, perfect, then I will help you lose weight because that's important. You need to be alive, ideally. Right?
So that's my 2 cents on this whole Lizzo and Jillian Michaels’ story. And, at the end of the day, I love this “Hair toss, check my nails, baby how’re you feeling? Feeling good as hell!”. So, I think we should all walk around and all strut our way through life. Feeling good as hell.